We are both really busy with YEAR TWO and our respective jobs and everything else in-between. We promise not to leave such a long gap next time. We’ve got a few adventures planned for 2011, but before that we should really cover how we closed out 2010.

It had been a while since we had a big party at the house, and with Christmas coming up it made sense to plan something special. Julia heard about an authentic London double decker bus for rent that somehow made its way to Phoenix. We booked it for the night before Christmas Eve and invited 60 or so of our closest friends to take a tour of the holiday lights. Through some strange legal loophole, we were allowed to eat, drink, and be merry on the bus as it made its way from spot to spot.

We started with pizza for everyone in our 1,200 sq. ft. home and a little pre-game Christmas cheer (SHOTS and MULLED WINE) before our ride arrived. It was kind of a surreal experience, having a double decker party bus show up in our neighborhood. Some of the neighborhood teenagers were pretty blown away, so much so that they wouldn’t get on when we were ready to disembark. Maybe they thought it was strange? We thought it was MAGICAL!

We really had a blast, and hope that everyone else did too. While it was a sort of booze cruise, no one got out of hand and nothing got smashed enroute, at least that we know of. CHRISTMAS SPIRIT, EVERYBODY!

Some things we learned:

• Quieter people naturally gravitated to the first floor, while if you were on the second floor you were immediately indoctrinated as a member of the wild bunch.
• Vuvuzelas are NOT allowed on the first floor of the bus, as they can be distracting to the driver (Side Note: Julia stopped at a 24-hour Toys ‘R’ Us on her way home from a grueling holiday shift at Tinyprints and purchased every vuvuzela in the store for the party. They are now considered collector’s items) .
• Some people are REALLY into Christmas, so much so that they’ll allow a motley crew of 50+ strangers into their house to check out their awesome Christmas Village display which ultimately pales in comparison to the grandeur they had set up outside. Our nephew Trinidad even got to use their bathroom, and guess what? IT WASN’T EVEN DECORATED!
• At the time of our party, 4loko was still readily available in Phoenix-area liquor stores.

If you missed it, we’re sorry—It was one for the record books. It was definitely a unique way to enjoy the holidays and to spread some cheer to all our friends. The only one who didn’t have a stellar time was Daggers, who did not like having so many people in her house at the same time. She let her thoughts about the party be known later on as she purposely failed at some cat acrobatics and smashed a LEGO model into its original brick-y form.

Regards,

-Bobby & Julia

Well wishes on an RC COLA SIGN!!!

My parents threw us a GIANT party at Assumption Hall in Hobart, Indiana a month after our Tucson wedding and it was soooo much fun! There were lots of kids running around, tons of dancing, traditional polish fare and, of course, some boozing. (I left out the photos that document my descent from “happy bride” to “incoherent drunk.”)

It was christmas-themed, with giant decorated sugar cookies as the centerpieces, candy canes as favors and a verrry special guest!

We had a photographer at the back of the room to take photos of families in front of an insanely adorable and GLITTERY cardboard standup of a gingerbread house! He also took some general pictures of the event (Click on the photo to see more):

Table pictures!

Dancing photos (Thanks Carl for always keeping the dance floor moving!)

Our special guest, SANTA CLAUS!!

Our awesome guests of the evening!

The real stars of the night: all the adorable kids!

Details like the amazing gingerbread house cardbox made by my Aunt Debbie!

THANK YOU to everyone who attended! It was so overwhelming that hundreds of people were together in a room to celebrate our wedding! And thank you to John & Anita for throwing such a great party for us!

You can see behind-the-scene photos of the process on her blog! She is a spectacular artist and truly great at collaboration, it was a painless and fun experience and now I want to get illustrations made of EVERYONE I know Thank you Stella for being so awesome!!!!

And our shoutout from the Frances & Smeeks blog!

Today, etsy.com is running a blog I adapted from my original posts about etsy and how to throw a fun, eco-friendly wedding without spending a wad of cash!

Check it out!

and two tees and we got a handful of tour-exclusive buttons and stickers. We’re pretty sure we were the oldest people there, except for like… a random dad. But hey! Whatever, right?!

Thanks Johnny Cupcakes for a fun-filled night! You can VAGUELY see us in the video below, but mostly you can catch a glimpse of the badassness of the cupcake van. It played mario theme songs through an ice-cream-truck-like speaker!

Well, we weren’t referring to putting a bowling alley in the basement or installing a disco ball, we meant grown-up stuff like NEW WINDOWS!!!!!

I realize it’s lame to devote an entire blog post to something like windows, it’s a pretty bland thing to be excited about. But dammnit,

Our new windows are AMAAAAAZING!!!#$@1#*&@!!!!

Let me back up. When we moved into the house 2 years ago, we were just thankful we didn’t have to paint or rip out the flooring, everything looked legit and tidy. And then, summer hit.

And the crappy single-paned, original windows from the 80s promptly let out ALL of our air conditioning because apparently, paint isn’t a sufficient sealant for drafts!

Which lead to giant electric bills, about as much money as seen below, but you know, without the billionaire duck.

And because we live in the always-classy North Phoenix, the “extra security” in the windows’ base was actually just a wooden stick:

Did I mention that our worst-windows-ever also didn’t have screens? So if we wanted fresh air, we got a ton of bugs, including one time when we had a menacing mosquito colony living in our house.

the only GOOD thing about having to open the doors to get a fresh breeze was our scrappy cat DAGGERS who wandered into our house one day and never left:

(that last photo is a 3 way hand hold. You are jealous)

Butt…. back to the windows.

Last week, a work crew arrived and tore out the loathsome beasts

And soon, our new double-paned lovelies arrived.

Inbetween the panes are a layer of mylar and krypton. So, unfortunately, Superman can never visit

And besides brightening up the exterior of our house from this:

to this:

The real greatness is that we’ve had 3 days of 90 degree weather and we still haven’t had to run the air!

Do you see what I see?? A SCREEN!

I love you new windows! I’d give you a big hug but that’s sorta weird and it’d leave smudges everywhere!

Thank you to everyone who helped us through wedding gifts. Everytime we feel a breeze or a get a good night’s sleep without hearing the random cat fights in the neighborhood or fetch our energy bill from the mail, we’ll think of you!

yeah um… we haven’t had a whole lot of them yet! We were still knee-deep in weddingness until late February and it’s just recently that we’ve been able to climb into some resemblance of normal life! Who knew!?

Last weekend we went to San Diego for an overnight quicktrip, here are some photos we took  along the way!

First up: a stop at Dateland, Arizona for date shakes!

These facilities are for pets only, you greedy humans!

We stayed at a remodeled midcentury hotel that was MUCH smaller than I expected, The Pearl.

23 rooms circle the pool, where they host dive-in movies every Wednesday.

And you can play board games in the shag-carpeted lobby:

Our room featured all kinds of cool details, like a wallpaper panel from Geoff McFetridge,

wood stump stools, a plush and comfy bed,

and our own fish named Felix!

our room reservation included two cocktails and an appetizer at the bar downstairs

Who can resist a request with a pretty please??

The amazing “Christian the bartender” chatted about Phoenix with us and made the greatest drinks. We didn’t snap a picture of him, so here’s just a funny picture of a bartender to substitute:

One of my delicious drinks, the Bee’s Knees, had gin, honey, lavender syrup, lemon juice and GUMMI BEARS! And for the appetizer, we had the Bacon Confit with a potato cake and duck egg. I can still taste the Bacon, it was sinful!

After having fancy drinks, we headed over to The Casbah, the real reason for our mini-trip. The Casbah’s been a music landmark for 20 years and has all kinds of great stuff inside: like original Shepard Fairey stickers,

a light-up last supper painting,

and old-school videogames like Galaga, where Bobby nabbed the top score.

The main event: Adam Green! Adam played 19 HITS, danced his ass off and entertained the 17 people in attendance. That’s 1.117 songs per person!

Bobby and I seemed to be the only ones dancing and singing and everyone else looked pretty detached. Didn’t get a picture of that, either, but here’s one from a  ”detached hipsters” google image search:

See, it’s ok for me to make fun of hipsters, because we also took a cliche picture of ourselves in the mirror with our iphones and i texted the set in real time to my friend Brian. We’re just as bad!

After the show, we stumbled on an exhibit opening at subtext for Brian Flynn, a really cool artist whose work we’ve seen at Super7 on our honeymoon in San Fran. We bought a small print  from another artist, Steve Morris, called “A Reception of Accident with the Woodland King’s Court.”

Then we tried to score some free booze at the party upstairs, but were denied. Maybe we looked like tourists?

Next up: we climbed THE GIANTEST HILL EVER to get to the Imperial House to meet up with two awesome friends from college, Chris and Heather. For some unkown reason, I forgot to take pictures of them, but they are adorable and amazing, just like puppies and kittens!

We drank and chatted and laughed and most of all, GROOOOVED to the sweet stylings of the legendary Rick Lyon:

After some gossip, laughter and pizza, we returned to the hotel to rest up for a little shopping the next day in Old Town San Diego. Old Town SD was pretty cheezy, but we loved visiting Gunnzo, where we got a frostie beats toy, and we annoyed a whole store of people by playing with “pull my finger” fart pens.

Bobby also ran into FUTURE BOBBY. We hope history hasn’t been altered as a consequence of this meeting.

Thanks San Diego for a great time! We love you and your thoughtfulness toward ducks!

And your amazing guitar signs with floating heads!

1) Keep the elements that you CAN control simple. There are a ton of things you have no control over. Like the length of time trying to get a guest list out of the families. Or having RSVPs up until the final week before the event. To simplify things we could control, we didn’t have a bridal party. It meant less expense (bouquets, hotel rooms, gifts, etc.) and less decisions (their attire) and less people to coordinate to get together at a set time or place. Our lack of a wedding party didn’t mean any less support, though. My amazing friend Amanda did SO much for us over our wedding weekend. From helping ceremony setup to helping me get dressed in the morning and about a billion things inbetween. She did it all without complaint and merely because she loves us, not because she had a “title.” Likewise, my sister Patty threw me a shower in Arizona without having a “maid of honor” badge. And my brother-in-law Carl controlled the laptop dj simply because we asked. When people scoffed at my lack of bridesmaids, (“but you haaaaave to have witnesses!!”) I would calmly tell them that our mothers would be signing our marriage certificate and then they’d pause for a second and leave me alone.

2) Stop wasting so much time worrying. I didn’t take this advice at all, but looking back over the last year, if I cut out some of the time worrying about things and just enjoying life, it would be a better use of my time. We ended up having more than enough money in our budget, so all the nights that visions of dollar signs kept me awake were pretty lame. Guests that backed out at the last minute were replaced with random people who weren’t even invited, so no plates were wasted and we weren’t charged extra. I’m not saying DON’T worry at all, but just catch yourself way before the part when you’re crying, or before the stress headaches. It WILL work out. It may not be the way you imagined, but it will work out and be wonderful.

3) Things won’t go as planned. Our reception ended WAY early. Like two hours early. People started leaving without saying goodbye, or leaving to change clothes and I was extremely upset. Thank goodness there are no photos of Bobby and my sister talking me off my self-imposed wedge. What DID happen afterward though is that we got to hit the wig shop before it closed for our fabulous/creepy wig photos, we got extra time for portraits after the reception and the event came across as so “laid back” that our guests complemented us on the lack of planned activities (dancing, etc.) which enabled them to stroll around town, take a nap or just visit with friends for the rest of the afternoon. I feel foolish for crying!

4) Prepare prepare prepare if you’re DIY. I wrote EVERYTHING out that needed to get done for the weekend. Parents and guests received schedules, I sorted reception space tasks into boxes and wrote out how to set up and take down each section and pasted it inside the boxes. Each box was also labeled on the outside about its contents. I didn’t do this so people would read the instructions or cherish a crazy-person’s manic scheduling, I did it so that I knew what to tell people during set up time and could rest easy that I actually told our families about the time for our brief rehearsal. People WILL make fun of you for being so organized and seeming totally overplanned, but nothing got left behind. The horror stories that would freak me OUT from people’s recaps were always along the lines of “I spent two weeks tying bows on ____ and then we forgot them at home.” My gawd. I can think of nothing worse than my DIY time totally wasted. Take ownership of your OWN projects and make sure everyone knows what you’re thinking. If you expect people to read your mind about ceremony music order or where to hang tissue paper balls, you have only yourself to blame for your disappointment. The night before the wedding, I calmly handed someone a box, told them what to do with the contents and before I knew it, everything was up like the vision in my head, almost magical like I had fairies. THANK YOU to our cousins Liz, Sabrina, Dave, Joey, friends Amanda, Kevin, Nancy, Linda and my sister Patty for all their help in setup.

5) Stick to your instincts, you know your wedding better than others. People repeatedly tried to talk me out of making all of our cupcakes. But I knew we couldn’t afford 150 cupcakes in 6 different flavors from a bakery. Plus, I wanted a gluten-free variety for a couple special guests. Once I had a plan together to finish them (I froze them over a few days, you could freeze them up to a month if you have the room), it was pretty painless. And the time spent frosting them with my aunts, mom, sister and Amanda are some of the funniest and fun memories from the entire weekend. It was a way to include others without completely delegating. Plus, I don’t think a bakery could produce something as endearingly tacky as the end product.

6) Look at the places you love as possible venue options. When we started looking at venues, nothing seemed quite right until we really thought about where we love to be. We have so many fond memories of The Hotel Congress that it should have been obvious to start there instead of looking elsewhere. I never understand why people get married at places they want to “completely transform.” If you love your venue, your venue will love you back. Deborah, Elizabeth and the staff at the Copper Room put so much extra effort we didn’t even plan that enhanced the event. Their staff wore cowboy bandanas, our biscuit baskets had vintage linens, the corn pudding was brought to each table in cast iron skillets collected from the staff’s kitchens and Elizabeth brought in her vintage collection of gravy boats. Anywhere else, these extras would have affected our bottom line, but we showed them love and we got it back in spades. Think about where you and your spouse feel “at home” and figure out a way to make it work. You’ll receive more than you expect.

7) If you’re dong something untraditional, just make sure your guests feel special. We were met with little resistance about doing a wedding that was offbeat. Sure, there were controversies that we weren’t getting married in the church, but everyone came around in the end. We made sure that everyone felt a part of the day, no matter how strange they thought it was. I knew if we were going to get married on stage at a rock club with limited seating, the very least we could do was make sure our family would have reserved seats. And if we couldn’t afford an open bar, we could spoil them with candy and cookies and a delicious spread of food. And if they made the trip all the way to Arizona, maybe they’d get a kick out of seeing their response card hung up like art. The little touches do matter if you’re doing them to enhance your guests experience, not so much if you just want things to match or look cute.

8 ) Grab a shoebox and fill it with tools. No one WANTS to be hot-gluing boutonnieres back together the night before their wedding, but it happens. I packed a shoebox full of scissors, glue, tape, glue gun, extra glue, safety pins, sticky tack, wrapping paper, etc. It helped with last-minute fixes because stuff WILL break.

9) Pay for it yourself. This won’t work for everyone, but I am soooooooooooooo happy we did it this way. We not only had complete reign over how to spend our money (more on food, none on booze, way more than expected on invites, etc.) but we learned valuable skills along the way. After spending so much time stashing away money each month, we live leaner and simpler now. We downgraded our cable and plan grocery lists and never see movies for full price. The tricks we learned throughout saving for the wedding empowered us to keep on a limited living budget after the wedding and set us up for a great future as marrieds. It also proved that we are totally capable of saving for a big goal (something we were shocked to learn, after being terrible savers.)

10) But it’s also ok to ask for help in specific areas. We picked a major element for each set of parents to help us financially. By picking something specific, it meant they couldn’t control the flower or food situation, only their part. Bobby’s parents paid for the wedding photos (we paid for the engagement shoot) and they turned out beyond beautiful and wonderful. My parents threw us a big shower and GIANT reception in Indiana for all the relatives and family friends who weren’t able to attend, and they also bought my dress. Bobby’s parents also threw us a very fun BBQ in California a few months after the wedding. Letting parents help with finances won’t diminish what you’re trying to accomplish, but having them pay for EVERYTHING will be an uphill battle to accomplish the event you’re ultimately seeking.

I hope these tips have helped! It feels so strange to be putting a cap on my experience, but now I can move onto bigger, brighter, MARRIED things!

We had ZERO decorations for the ceremony. No flowers, aisle runners, shepherd’s hooks at the end of rows, etc. But we also didn’t need them, we got married on stage at one of our favorite rock clubs, the Club Congress! It was one of our motivations to get married at the Hotel Congress, and it also meant our “waiting area” wasn’t something as ordinary as a church lobby or side room, it was a bar!

Although we did but effort into piecing together our readings and elements of the ceremony, the time we spent was completely dwarfed by amount of time spent on the reception. But it had so many lovely moments that left people laughing, crying, laughing again, cheering and then crying again.

It all started with our friend Trent working the crowd with a stand-up routine.

Which transitioned into innocent walking down the aisle-ness for our officiant (Bobby’s Kung Fu teacher), my sister and brother-in-law and Bobby’s parents. And then, the crowd erupted in laughter when they spotted…

our ring bear. That’s my mom and my nephew Trinidad, the biggest sport ever. I doubt you could find another 11-year-old who volunteers to wear a hot and stuffy bear costume for a half hour and STILL poses for pictures like a celebrity after the ceremony. Fun fact: my mom found out probably one minute before walking down the aisle about our surprise. She wasn’t exactly thrilled, but luckily the processional music started!

Next up was Bobby in his dashing custom-made suit from Duchess and the moment I’ll never forget, a standing room of all my loved ones and relatives as I walked with my amazing father. Did I mention the song we all walked to was “Start of Something New” from High School Musical? Oh yes, it was wonnndderrfullll.

Our families are both avid Catholics, so we knew it would be strange for them that we weren’t getting married in the church. We passed around our rings so they could pray on them, make a silent wish for our future or just inject some good karma onto them. It was a way they could express their faith in the middle of a rock club.

Bobby also read a Veteran’s day prayer (the holiday was the following week) which made even the manliest of men in the audience choke up. Our fathers were both in Vietnam and deal with their war experiences in completely different ways. This tie between them also united the two families in a profound way.

Our only reading was a passage from “The Velveteen Rabbit.” It spoke to us because of the very last part “Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.” After the year we’d had of scrimping to save enough for the wedding, layoffs at our workplaces, mountains of DIY projects, etc., we were in a constant state of feeling “very shabby.” At this point, we hadn’t slept for a few days, after shuttling a giant van full of wedding stuff to Tucson, setting up for the reception, writing my vows at midnight the night before, we only hoped we didn’t LOOK as shabby as we felt!

After the reading and our candy ceremony, it was time for a coin toss to determine who would say their vows first. Bobby won and he made me cry and cry and cry. It was the sweetest speech I have ever heard and at that moment it was just me, him and a bear out of the corner of my eye.

All that was left was some ring exchanging action, a kiss and the proclamation that we were now… Mr. and Mrs. Julia & Bobby!

Our last surprise was the Star Wars Throne Room song (a favorite of offbeat brides everywhere), but we also planted light sabers in the audience. Everyone cracked up and we even had an official archway to walk under.

If you had told me the part of the day I would most cherish would be the part we didn’t spend much money or time with a hot glue gun, I would have laughed at your naivete. We could have walked right out the door onto the streets of Tucson, and the day would have been perfect beyond my wildest dreams.

BUY LESS CRAP!

Or specifically, crap you can’t find a home for after the wedding. Before you buy something, assess where the item will go after the honeymoon. The landfills and dumpsters don’t need my wedding decorations, they’re already full, thank you.

All the photos in this post (unless otherwise noted) were taken by the talented and gifted photographers Chris Hinkle and Anthony French of Mira Weddings.

Our cowboy bunny, cowboy hats and dollar store plastic cowboy dudes who invaded every surface of the room and filled our ball jar centerpieces were handed off to a children’s cowboy birthday party.

The awesome cat painting and cowboy room decorations adorn the walls of our house, as well as the cardboard JUBBY letters (Julia + Bobby= Jubby)

The six flag banners I lovingly sewed over my furlough last year were bought by our venue, the Hotel Congress.

The tissue paper balls were reused at a craft fair in December, then destroyed (also lovingly) by toddlers at our Indiana reception. Put to good use, indeed. (Toddler photos by Amy Wilson)

We sold some platters, gave some to friends, donated some to my hair salon (they use them to display hair product) and brought a few back to Goodwill.

If your wedding is truly a reflection of you as a couple, it is easy to get away with cheap options and just shop within your current belongings. The toys for our seating card table were from our house or borrowed from family. The squirrel is mine, it’s a long story.

Buttons appeared everywhere, as our seating cards (each table was a different cowboy and the buttons told guests where to sit), as extra goodies in our welcome bags, as presents in our invitations, not because we saw them used in another wedding, but because we already had the equipment and supplies. Look around your house and find things before you buy new machines, gadgets and materials. It will be greener and less expensive.

When something doesn’t work out, but you have the supplies already, just use them. NO ONE will know your original plan! We were going to have a DIY photobooth, but realized the logistics were a headache. My mom had already purchased mustaches, so instead of tossing them, we had a friend pass them out. No one realized their original purpose and they were a huge hit.

A lot of times, I wanted to buy something I thought would be good for our aesthetics. From dance floor decals to vintage table decorations to photo printers, if I didn’t have a home for it after the wedding, it wasn’t worth it, which saved our budget in the end. Even if something’s on sale, is it really worth tossing it in the trash?